A man turned to Reddit's AITA ("Am I the A--hole") subreddit community to seek opinions on whether he was at fault for requesting his girlfriend to adopt a more traditional female role when they visit his family in the near future.
"I have a big family that’s incredibly close," Reddit user GraveYardSchift wrote in a Sunday post.
"We have big family dinners every few months, where we all meet at my great-grandfather’s estate and eat together."
According to the Reddit user's account, the women are expected to handle the cooking during these family gatherings while the men are exempted from the task. The user acknowledged that this arrangement is highly sexist but mentioned that as one of the family's youngest members, his objections hold no weight.
The man explained that in previous instances, women who attended the family dinner and chose not to cook faced social exclusion. It's worth noting that these women are typically in long-term relationships with family members, either as wives or girlfriends.
You can check out the Reddit thread here:
He continued, "When I have seen new partners not cook, it’s gone bad … [The woman is] completely ostracized," he said, and there's "cattiness" and rudeness" directed at these new partners.
"This dinner will be in two weeks and my girlfriend was asked if she would attend," he continued. "Initially she said, ‘Yes,’ which is great."
When the situation was explained to his girlfriend she was "understandably bothered," the poster also said.
"I told her I understood where she was coming from; however, it's best for everyone if she just played along," he continued.
Continuing his story, the man expressed that he acknowledged his girlfriend's perspective on the matter. Nevertheless, he insisted that it would be beneficial for everyone involved if she simply went along with the traditional role expected of her during the visit.
The man continued, "She told me that it’s unacceptable and that if she has to do that she will not be going." He is trying to find a compromise with her, "but she won’t budge" — and she is now angry with him.
"She told me that if I think it’s acceptable to make her do this, I’m just as bad as everyone else," he continued, "while my point is that she needs to make a good first impression."
The Reddit community had plenty of negative things to say to the male poster.
"Why would he really try to fix anything when he benefits from it?" one commenter said of the poster.
Another made an assumption saying, "I believe the term ‘grandfather's estate’ helps in the explanation — inheritance."
Yet another person shared their thoughts, "It's never really about women. It's about rank among men. Men eat first, men are waited on and cleaned up after."
What do you think? Is it now "sexist as hell" for women to cook and men to hang out and watch sports?
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